Special Needs Abu Dhabi: 10/10/10

Welcome to Special Needs Abu Dhabi

Raising a child with special needs can be, in itself, quite challenging. Raising a child with special needs in a new country seems to add much more to that challenge. I started this blog shortly after my husband and I, and our two sons, moved to Abu Dhabi in the summer of 2009. We lived there for under 2 years and are now living back in the United States.

Our oldest son, AJ, has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Sensory Processing Disorder. Finding the resources in Abu Dhabi to help him with his special needs was an ongoing effort. In the U.S., the public school system provides testing, accommodations, and an Individual Education Plan (IEP) for students with special needs, so we were spoiled there -- and dismayed at the seemingly apparent shortage of resources available to ex-patriot families (aka "ex-pats") in Abu Dhabi.

There are resources available in Abu Dhabi -- you just have to know where to look. Which is why I started this blog. My hope was to bring together in one place information to help parents of kids with special needs... so you will at least have a starting point. I also wanted this to be a place where we can reach out and support one another with advice and sometimes just a shoulder to lean on.

We have been back in the U.S. for about a year now, and I haven't written on the blog since the move -- until now. There have been a few parents who found the blog and wrote to me for advice -- and I have been happy to give it. I'm glad that it continues to serve its original purpose of helping ex-pat parents to find resources in Abu Dhabi to help their kids with special needs.

Recently, I have begun feeling the need to write again, but I've been unsure how to move ahead with the blog. In hindsight, I don't know if life is any less challenging in the U.S. than it was in Abu Dhabi. There are still daily struggles. I continue to advocate for my son who has ADHD -- to get him the help in school and in life that he needs in order to thrive, learn and grow. There have been steps forward and backward. I have felt hopeless and hopeful.

If you are in Abu Dhabi, or considering a move there, please leave a comment. If you know of resources that you've found helpful, let me know and I'll add them to the list. If you come across an article or book that has made a difference in your child's life, please share. Most of all, I hope you will share your stories. Wherever you are, it's good to know you're not alone.

Thanks for coming by.

For our kids,

Karen

Saturday, October 16, 2010

The Right School for Your Special Needs Child

If you are considering a move to Abu Dhabi -- or, if you are considering moving your special needs child to a new school -- here are some questions you may want to ask the school representative before making your decision:

1. What is the school's philosophy regarding special needs? Is a diversity of abilities accepted?

2. What kind of support does the school provide (or allow) for children with special needs?

3. Does the school have a special resource teacher? If so, what kind of training does that teacher have? What is his/her experience?

4. Are children pulled out of regular classes for special support? If so, how often?

5. Are school counselors and classroom teachers trained in understanding special needs? (Some schools require training for teachers -- some do not.)

6. Is there a school nurse and are they able to dispense medication? How does the child get from class to the nurse to take medication -- on their own, or does someone take them?

7. What types of accommodations are allowed (or not allowed) at the school? Ask for examples and/or be specific with the types of accommodations your child may need. Will the school provide any of these accommodations or are the parents responsible?

Grandma is Here!

My husband's mother is visiting us in Abu Dhabi for about 5 weeks, having just arrived on Wednesday night. A lot of people reading this may be thinking, "Oh, I feel for you!" but, in reality, I've looked forward to her visit almost as much as the kids (and her own kid)! My husband and I have been married for over 25 years, so Grandma and I have had lots of time to work through our differences and appreciate and love each other. A huge part for me was learning to let go of problems that took place in the past and to focus on the positive aspects of our relationship, and her strong connection to her grandkids. We have wonderful, heart-felt talks when we're together. We both enjoy shopping. We both enjoy eating. We both enjoy being a tourist -- there is still so much to see and learn about in Abu Dhabi and I'm happy to have her here to share it. I'm sure there will continue to be times when we clash -- mostly over her saying "yes" a little too often to the kids (from my perspective, not hers), but you know what they say about grandparents and spoiling... not much one can do about it! A little spoiling from time to time is not so bad.

Her first night here, AJ insisted on sleeping with Grandma. She had no problem with it, so instead of going with my first instinct to say "absolutely not!" -- I said yes -- and he slept through the night with her. (I'm not sure how she slept though, given the jetlag, but she didn't complain. She never complains!) AJ slept with her again last night and slept all night. (He has promised that it won't be every night... We'll see.) He did get up before her and took her false teeth downstairs to play with them. :o) We found them (the teeth) sitting by the kitchen sink this morning!

Grandma has spent a lot of time reading about ADHD and is genuinely interested in understanding that side of AJ. It's so nice that she supports us in this. She doesn't blame his behavior on poor parenting skills. And she has a calming influence on both our kids, which is very welcome. So, welcome Grandma! It's so good to have you here! We love you!!

For our kids,
Karen

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Children Learn What They Live

This is a favorite poem of mine that one of my kid's teachers sent home last year...

Children Learn What They Live

If a child lives with criticism,

he learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility,

he learns to fight.

If a child lives with ridicule,

he learns to be shy.

If a child lives with jealousy,

he learns to feel guilty.

vvvvvv

If a child lives with tolerance,

he learns to be patient.

If a child lives with encouragement,

he learns confidence.

If a child lives with praise,

he learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with fairness,

he learns justice.

If a child lives with security,

he learns to have faith.

If a child lives with approval,

he learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship,

he learns to find love in the world.

~Dorothy Law Nolte~

For our kids,

Karen